To nuke or not to nuke?

Two years and almost four months ago, when Martin and I moved to San Francisco, we limited ourselves the amount of stuff that would fit in a Toyota Camry. And I admit that we did store (and still are storing) some stuff at mom and dad's before we left in order to get down to only a carload. We also donated and sold a lot of our belongings before we left as well. Since then, we've lived in two small studio apartments and have still accumulated more stuff than we need or use. It's hard not to in our consumerist culture. Every where you look someone or something is telling you what you need and want.

Martin making pesto, note the need to stack the ingredients due to the lack of counter space.

A few weeks ago, Martin and I decided to go through everything in the apartment and ask ourselves if we needed or wanted to keep it. We were able to donate two appliances, clothes, shoes, books, toys and a number of other household items. Some we had purchased. Some were gifts. Some were things we had brought with us. It's interesting how over time how one's perceptions of what one needs changes.

A flower bud on the kitchen table.

One of the appliances that we got rid of was our microwave. Not because we're afraid of the radiation or anything like that. When Krista, my sister and her boyfriend Tommy came to visit in August, they talked about how they didn't have a microwave. After they left, I kept thinking about how much counter space our microwave took up (did I mention we live in a studio apartment). So sometime in October, I asked Martin if we could put the microwave in the closet, just to see what it would be like to live without one. And we managed. We make popcorn on the stove. I heat my rice sock, for my headaches, in the oven. Leftovers go in a pot or a skillet. The extra time it takes, which is not always the case, is more than made up for by the ability to have room on the counter to actually make something.

Our newly found counter space.

Now that we have de-cluttered the apartment, I find myself torn between two conflicting impulses. On one hand, I want to continue purging and opening up more space. To continue questioning if I really need this or that. On the other hand, I find myself thinking about things that I want, things to fill the space I've cleared out in my internal and external space.

Living Lighty

As I grow older, I think more about living lightly. What do I really need and how much stuff is enough? As the queen of kitsch, my family knows how much I like my "stuff". In fact some may say I weigh down the space I live in with the pictures, the plants and the many treasures that I have either found, bought for myself or been given. I have lived in the same house for twenty years and items accumulate over time. Lauryn, you told me about learning of individuals who are making a conscious choice to only own a finite number of possessions. One number you spoke of was less than thirty possessions. I am amazed when I hear a number so low. I mean compared to what I own, it is such a vast difference. Of course this family home is also where the recent children (now living out on their own) have left things to store so, I can honestly say our home houses a lot of memorabilia.

Sometimes the clutter is comforting, but mostly it is distracting. So I clean and organize and the space feels better. Taking down the holiday decorations yesterday, I let go of things just taking up space and all I kept has beauty or serves a purpose. It is a good exercise to practice, letting go of all that does not serve you or is not beautiful or meaningful. If you begin to think of the space around you as energy, the things you don't want or use can literally drain your energy. So back to how much stuff is enough? I find I am asking myself this question in earnest now that my parents are getting older and are finding that the weight of having and caring for things, gets in the way of daily living. I will never be comfortable with a minimalist approach to my home or personal space, but I do appreciate simplicity and the idea shared by my friend Melody in her book Partnering with Your Space,

"Just like people and animals, homes and possessions desire to fulfill the measure of their creation. A crib is made to be a resting place for a baby, not to sit in an attic. A dresser wants to hold clothing, not gather dust in a basement. Artwork desires to contribute beauty to a space not to sit unused in a closet."

As my awareness grows, I realize to create a home that supports my family, I choose to release the clutter, finding good homes for things I no longer need and discarding that which will serve no one. There are many options available to recycle used items such as www.readertoreader.org to donate books to schools in need, www.sharetechnology.org for computers and printers, www.excessaccess.org for furniture, clothing and appliances, and www.freecycle.org . These resources and more are there to consciously move in a direction that supports freedom from clutter. I am open and ready to de-clutter and although I will not likely pare my possessions down to even a mere 100 items, I do envision a healthy decrease in the amount of stuff I presently claim to need.